45 Golf Phrases and Stupid Questions I’m Tired of Hearing

  1. “You Da Man!” Doesn’t get much worse than this.
  2. How did that not go in? Want me to begin the list of reasons?
  3. Thought I had that. No one else did.
  4. Another one lipped out. Yea. Yea. Clean that up and let’s move on.
  5. That should have gone in. If it should have it would have.
  6. Must have hit that on the toe. Again?
  7. Never up never in. Brilliant!
  8. How did I leave that short? Didn’t hit it hard enough.
  9. “He took the flag out. He’s going to try and make it.” He’s tried to make it with every stroke. That’s the idea.
  10. Think that’s out? Could be. I lost sight of it going over that row of houses.
  11. Thought I had enough club to get there. You do, just not that one.
  12. Did that clear the lake? If the splash is any indication, no.
  13. I hit that fat. Again?
  14. That may be gone. I better reload. You mean you’re hitting three.
  15. Didn’t see where that ended up. I better hit another one just in case. You mean you’re hitting three.
  16. That may be O.B. I better hit a provisional. Finally got it right!
  17. I just can’t hit this club. Why do you carry it?
  18. That was enough club to clear the hazard. Apparently not.
  19. Is this my ball or yours? You can’t be serious.
  20. Did you see where that went? The woods.
  21. Didn’t see that much break. Obviously.
  22. Here it is! Funny, that’s not where it went in the woods.
  23. Found it! Couldn’t have. It’s over here.
  24. I never hit this club well. Do you have one you do hit well?
  25. I practice that shot all the time. Doesn’t look like it.
  26. I should have hit more club. We can see that.
  27. I can’t putt these greens. It’s not the greens Eugene.
  28. I’ve got the flat stick working. You’ve made one putt. Big deal.
  29. Someone got a tee I can use? Come on Eugene, they sell a bag of 1,000 for $5.
  30. Can you mark that one to the right? You think that mark’s going to bother your putt from 50 feet?
  31. I crushed that nine iron. That’s your six iron Eugene.
  32. That’s got to go! A lot!
  33. Didn’t hit that well but I can find it. Hard to lose a ball a hundred yards ahead of us.
  34. I’ll take it. You have to. It’s the rules.
  35. Good miss. You mean, ‘got lucky?’
  36. Thought I had a hole-in-one. Yea, but a lot of people make birdies.
  37. “Get in the hole!” At least you’ve got the idea behind the game.
  38. Looks like I’ll be showing you the line. Not the way you putt.
  39. I hit that putt way too hard. Ten feet past the hole is proof.
  40. If I make this putt, I’ll be two over. Relax Eugene, we’ve still got the back nine to play.
  41. This round will definitely help my handicap. The idea is to lower your handicap not increase it.
  42. How come I have to give you strokes? It’s called the handicap system.
  43. I don’t hit the ball as far as you. And your point is?
  44. I play the Senior Tees. Show me where on the scorecard it says, ‘Senior Tees.’
  45. How’s Tiger doing? Only phrase worse than ‘you da man.’


1 Comment